Fish, footie and flying

Ever had one of those days when you just can't remember the Core Foundation Subjects of the National Curriculum? Or define the main factors that create an Effective Learning Environment?

Hmm, it's been a study crisis kind of a day and we're only on week two of the course. I blame the fun day I had at school observing lessons yesterday - I was lucky enough to pick a field trip day and took the opportunity to 'observe' Grade 7 on an outing to the local Cash and Carry to research products they might sell in a school shop they are planning to open. I observed quite a few items I would happily buy myself; I hope they'll let me tag along when they go to make the purchases. As for the students, it was literally watching kiddies in a sweet shop. Did you know you can still buy those candy cigarettes? At this place you can even pretend you're in candy duty-free and get 50 packs for a cut down price. I offered the group my services as a consultant representing the parent population who will be supplying the readies for their customers, in case they wanted to conduct a little market research on what Mummy will approve for little Johnny to spend his hard earned cash on. But once I'd put the kibosh on chewing gum, candy fags, fizzy pop and crisps they strangely stopped asking.

Anyway, after all the excitement (and the fun-packed journey with four eleven-year-old boys in my car) slaving over a hot OfSTED website didn't hold much appeal today. I think I learned that there are three types of planning - long, medium and short term (no kidding) - but that's about it. Luckily I was saved by a couple of friendly teachers at the school who were willing to listen to me rant then allow me to grill them about teaching practices when I went the collect the skunks. (What they don't know is I had a concealed tape recorder taking down all their pearls of wisdom so I can use them in my assignments as my own ideas! I AM KIDDING, Mr Course Tutor, Sir.)

Enough of study talk though. Let me tell you what I did at the weekend.

On Saturday we were invited to one of those company Family Fun Day things at a local camp. It was pretty good all told. I learned how to weave a bird out of strips of coloured paper while Poppet fashioned a pin-wheel, and Nobby and Pickle played football. Then I walked the dog round the forest while Poppet did some fishing in the little pond, and Nobby and Pickle played football. Later, Pickle and I raided the free buffet while Poppet fished... and Nobby played football. Poppet had a ride on a pony, while Pickle fished (and Nobby played football). Then Pickle and I visited the three fire engines they'd laid on and he went up on the hydraulic lift about 10 storeys in the air (it was strictly not for me, despite the comforting presence of a pretty fit fireman who offered to let me wear his helmet...) while Poppet fished and Nobby played football.

Are you getting a pattern here? Poppet and Pickle's previous angling experience is limited to a game called 'My Simms' on the DS but they were sorely bitten by the bug once they got a rod in their hands and the little fishies started to bite. Incidentally, I am doing Nobby down a bit here, he did come and join in between football games, they were only twenty minutes each, and he was rather keen on the fishing too, having been brought up by a keen angler and done quite a lot when he was younger. (But who caught the first fishy with the rod though, huh? Me!)

However the kids soon discovered a quicker way to catch lots of tiddlers using a large square net that you chuck off a bridge then pull up as they're scurrying past. Once they were over the revulsion of handling their slimy, flapping little bodies Poppet in particular had a wonderful afternoon hauling them in, then picking the dead ones out of the bucket.

Pickle joined in the fishing for an impressively long time after tiring of the football and then he decided it was time to test Mummys nerve to the max (as if he doesn't do that on a daily basis anyway). Before I knew what I had volunteered for he was in a harness and hard hat, attached by ropes to a chap known as 'Chubby' and shinning up a telegraph pole, gaily calling 'Come on Mum! You can do it!!' over his shoulder.

May I refer you back to the earlier paragraph about the lovely fireman and how he couldn't persuade me up his ladder? Well, I couldn't let my little boy down like that so up I went - it was one of those aerial assault course things, all about fifteen metres off the ground and requiring some serious monkey skills that my 7 year old has in abundance and which I sadly seem to have lacked since birth.

I get vertigo on a deep-pile carpet people, this was not fun.

I think the mountaineer types who were operating the thing quickly cottoned on to this fact as I bear-hugged each telegraph pole I arrived at like I was greeting an old friend. Meanwhile Pickle whizzed across swinging ropes, narrow bridges and what was basically a tightrope and proceeded to jump off the final platform for the final lowering to terra firma singing 'I Believe I Can Fly' at the top of his voice.

As if that wasn't enough, he then climbed up a single telegraph pole, stood on a tiny platform on the top, then jumped off, hitting a large beach-ball on the way down. All for shits and giggles.

I am happy to report that while I was trying to force my heart out of my throat and back to its proper place, Nobby and his company team won the football tournament. Unfortunately I missed the trophy ceremony because I was watching my son fly through the air on the end of a rope but I heard the applause through the trees and I was very proud.