This morning Pickle grabbed hold of my ipod as we were driving to our pottery class (I have resorted to messy, touchy-feely, arty-farty stuff to try and get him off the screens and its proved quite a hit. There are other lively boys there to chat with and he's discovered a flair for crafting bees from clay.)
'Haven't you go Cover Flow on this thing?' he said.
'What on earth is Cover Flow?' I asked, but I never did find out.
Later he was discussing with his pottery buddies which Pickman is his favourite.
'What are you going on about?' I asked.
'Oh, it's just a Wii game, Mum,' he replied and carried on the discussion. I don't think I am invited into the World of Wii.
Later Poppet regaled a delightful dream she had the other night.
'I was a giant and I picked Pickle up but accidentally dropped him down the plughole. I had to take apart all the plumbing to get him out and then he stank so bad I had to bath him every day for a month. I just held him up under the tap.'
Am I the only one finding their kids' worlds a totally foreign country? Am I supposed to know what a Cover Flow is? Can't I have a favourite Pickman?
I have to say ignorance is bliss compared to hearing my own voice coming out of their mouths. Just yesterday I heard one of them lamment, very loudly,
'Oh for goodness sake!'
And when, somehow, we got onto the subject of me having more babies in McDonalds on Monday (don't ask me how) and I asked Poppet what she would say if I told her I was pregnant she replied, 'I'd probably say Holy s.*.*.t!' (She did spell it by the way but still.)
Following all his recent web surfing Pickle decided to give me the low-down on how you should never keep a deer if you have a dog. I tried to tell him that deer are not usually considered pets but he went on to tell me about how he'd watched footage of a lady feeding a baby deer, who subsequently went back to its Mummy, who then galloped over and attacked the woman's dog. Pickle takes this to mean that deer are protective of their young (probably true and very incisive) and that all baby deer are tattle-tales who like getting dogs into trouble (hmmm).
I never knew Youtube home movies were so informative.
Anyway, the big news in our house is that we are moving back to the UK next month.
Yeah, when I said big I meant BIG.
The kids are taking it really well. Poppet went atraight to her notebook to start planning her bedroom. Pickle wanted to make sure he's taking all his stuff with him, including the hamster.
As for me, I am up to my armpits in lists and plans and tidying. Poor old Nobby keeps discovering things have been put away, chucked out or sold every night. So far I've sold my car and the spare bed and I have half a basement full of other stuff we don't need to schlepp across the continent just to sit in our attic.
My folks are even in on the game. They are taking in Tiggy and Lucky Hamper early next week while the rest of us nip off on holidays (me and kids) and spangly new jobs (Nobby). They were probably looking forward to a nice relaxing summer full of dancing engagements and weekends away. Now they've got to find a hamster cage and a dog bowl and babysit instead. Big thanks to them both for helping us out.
So there you go, the expat dream is coming to an end. I am expecting plenty of bloggable episodes in the coming weeks so stay tuned.
Things I have learned so far this December...
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